Jolly Folly, Mighty Morphin'

2.4km in the morning plus swim in the afternoon. Doesn't sound exactly sound like a feat, but for someone who hasn't really worked out for quite long, it was quite bad. And it made me realise that I'm better at endurance and a sucker at strength. Think of me as a long piece of cha-kui-tiao rather than a stocky bun. Slipping into double digits for 2.4 was a no-no although I tried!, (I'm so depressed, world) and I had 3 cramps in the pool. NS, CHAM. (suddenly remembers this moment in Human Geog class where I had the most preposterous of cramps and was contorted physically right smack in the middle of class.)

I remember that time of the year, when we the TSD people were all so busy preparing our pieces, we pledged our committment whole-heartedly to TSD. I still remember Mrs Low and Mr Lofthouse asking me if I'm coming back next year to help out with the Year 2s' pieces. It was followed by the most ready "Of course! Sure!" I meant it. But now re-thinking the question and looking at life in VJ as a whole, I don't miss VJ. Not at the very least. I don't exactly miss Mr Lofthouse and Mrs Low even. Ms Lian, Mr Pang, Ms Lim, Mrs Chua, Mr Ho, Ms Low, Mr Harris, all were as good as it lasted. I know I've got some theatre in me, but I don't have TSD in me. I cannot imagine myself like Dong or Albert now, although I had always thought that I would be like them, giving my two cents' worth to my juniors.

Instead, as I realised, it's not the good times I miss, it's the hard times I not necessarily yearn for, but will keep in mind for at least a few decades to come. That very first week in January where I lost my wallet while rehearsing my Gala Night performance, which threw me in the doldrums! That struggle with Econs S and Literature! The enlightening experience with "The Physicists"! The demoralising period after Prelims.

I think it's because these things gave me something in return. Dong was impressed with my Gala Night performance and how he described my transition from Year One Mono to Duo to Gala Night made me realise BRANDON CAN DO IT! It opened up something. And for me, it meant something, that 2-night intense rehearsing proved worthwhile. My failed relationship proved to me that no matter what status two people's relationship are in, there is no stopping the care and love. Econs S was such a let-down, but it pushed me so hard, it made me realise some of the gems amid the numbers, theories and Mr Cook-esque ingenuinity...

I also thought that my A level group was forgettable. Being frank, and I think LT and Arika and Sunil and Yuhui and Vivienne can attest to it. The moment after our group As, I knew straight away that the end of the As practical, was the end of the group. We all went home straight! haha, and it was quite funny. Even pulic performance felt contrived when put together so haphazardly. Instead I remember my Prelims group. All that to-split-or-not-to-split dilemma, personality clashes, THRASHING OUR PIECE just less than one hundred hours to our exam felt dumb, but was in a sadistic way, finger lickin' good, as delicious as the pizza Corrie's mother brought for us on one of those nights where we were rushing the scoured eyeballs, the stiff acting and the Furies. My, under that orange light, behind the TSD toilets.

This post didn't mean to go this way. Phew. I think that wrapped up my 2005 school life quite well.

Sitting at AMK food centre with small boy Samuel Yeo who just HAD to remind us that NS was in 5 days' time twisted the mood to a melancholic one. Melvin, Samuel and I just sat there, like mummies eating cheng teng, silent, as if to take in whatever was around - the noise, the hype, the smell we won't be feeling for awhile. It was so damn depressing, with the rain out there and all. I just had to shoot Samuel in the ass. I remember that outstretched hand, the figure of 5. What a dampener on New Year's Eve.

New Year's Day was spent at home after a good night out with Dawn and Khairul, watching a breath-taking display of fireworks. The thing about Khairul is that he has become a very mature man, should I say, but still retained the raw frankness and jolly of the pre-NS days. The thing about Dawn is how she's always by her friends, and giving up Man U Vs Bolton to come out!

Having been out all month had caused staying at home on New Year's Day to be a dry spell rather than a post-drought rain.

Posted by Brandon at Saturday, December 31, 2005 | Permalink

Confessions on a piece of SWISS AIR PUKE BAG

This Thai trip was the shortest overseas trip (excluding JB outings), but it was THE BEST by far, because you know when you were small you went around, sometimes feeling tired, sometimes just agitated by boredom, but this time, you had the control to buy what you see and want. Bangkok basically is the place to shop, nothing else, and perhaps that's enough to round a trip up.

I think I've reached a level of maturity where planes and packing are no longer fascinating. I can truly say it's the TRAVEL, the clash of cultures, the way of life, the URBAN things that, upon observation, re-moulded my impression of the Thai experience.

So I (try to) present my perspective on the Bangkok trip, because for me it MUST be shared. EVERYONE must go to BANGKOK for once. I wrote down everything "blog-worthy" on a puke-bag. HERE GOES:

DAY 1

For me, Swiss Air was one of the WORST airlines, deserving relegation to the likes of Garuda Indonesia. HAR!!! WTH! Food was really not good, and the stewardesses spoke like they were so darn superior and shit. When I tried to practise my rusty French on one of them, "Excusez- moi, Vous avez un bonbon?",(You've got a sweet!?!?) I was given a straight "No" in what was a highly unlikely situation. I couldn't help but feel this differential Asian-Angmoh treatment, that manifested itself in the form of a quarrel I witnessed a few years ago on a Qantas flight.

THAT BLEMISHED BUT DIDN'T SPOIL THE TRIP!

The airport had a lounge which was supposed to house tourists overnight. When I walked past it, I was reminded of the TSD room, the CatHigh Council Room. It was stacked with so much rubbish that made it uninhabitable. You find that in Singapore's Airport, I will treat you.

The pollution, the hazy night air greeted us. Somehow I welcomed it, because it was Bangkok, UNIQUELY Bangkok! I was happy that that was the first sign that I was somewhere else on the world map, and it thrilled me to bits. Dirty buses and streets, LOVE it.

The hotel's top floor is Thailand's highest point. Here you see the WHOLE of Bangkok. WHOLE. When I read about urban areas, the pathetic image of a few skyscrapers in Orchard/Marina area springs up in mind, but here, the urban AREA is HUGEEEEEE. You do not see an end to the boundaries.

Day 2

In Thailand, there is the ever-ready "buy la" attitude. My father didn't bring any clothes except for what he wore for the flight. He slept in the hotel robe. And got down to buying stuff to wear. I think with so much consumer spending going on in the economy, it's not easy to be poor. Both my brother and father were looking for salons to dye their hair.

The streets of Thailand are plagued with surface irregularities. The tarmac roads have holes and depressions where water accumulates in pools. But somehow, these things don't change. No one seems to want to change these things. As much as this is Uniquely Bangkok, more so is the spirit of SHORT-TERM resolution. They place raised wooden platforms for people to walk on, so that our feet won't get wet in the pool of water. They would rather soak up water with cardboard than to fill the holes with some road mix. I think this very spirit is working against the whole, but still sustains the individual.

Roadside stalls are often dark, with one dim bulb illuminating the cooking area. Sometimes, I have this very weird image of the dark rims of the pots and pans, somehow the pot's like the floor pithole at the last moment in LOST, as if we can never get to the bottom or can never really see what's cooking. We only see steam, a ladle that seems too short, and out scoops some BROWN thing. Thailand's food is BROWN. Brown and brown. And pinches of sugar thrown in.

We came to a square complex with a four-faced Buddha, which was my personal favourite because I saw the Thai dance. Not because it was pretty and magnificent, it was because it was so tourist-oriented and mechanical. Basically, tourists pay for the dance to just squat and pray, as if the dance was an offering of thanks to the gods. But just the look on the dancers' face! Laden or rather burdened with make-up and a head dress, you could see the dispassionate eyes, the tired, wandering gaze at nothing, hands moving in prosaic routines, the rhythmless dance, the bored "Thank You" in Thai. It was so interesting to just stand and watch, as a piece of Thai culture was presented before my eyes, but in a form "which has had so much river flow over it, it has eroded smooth".

The idea of bargaining is more fun than shopping itself sometimes. We are sadistic creatures, because we derive so much pleasure from it. Getting something cheap off the shelves, THOUGH somewhere deep down, you know it, you just know it, that it has been marked up high so the prices can afford to dip a little. Even though we know that we are victims of such a consumer mentality manipulation, we let ourselves fall into it, because we like the feeling of people giving in to us! Watching my mature mother play the game of cat and mouse, "throwing a tantrum" and leaving the shop for the owner has refused to budge on a discount, but deep down already contemplating a purchase, with or without any slashed prices, MADE ME LAUGH HAHA! Then again made me think sometimes when we try to push it too far. I gave myself a chance to pick up the strings of my mum. A 350 baht long pants. I pushed it, KNOWING FOR SURE it wasn't going to work. "150 la!" I said, then having been rejected, left. BUT THAT OWNER CALLED ME BACK and settled on 150! That most prized purchase on the trip was like a hunted deer, and the feeling was like having caught the deer by its horns and triumphed. I tell you, this is what economics should be about. THE UTILITY one gets not because you bought something, it's because you bought it in a way that satisfied you.

Tabithan was throwing a REAL tantrum, and demanding that someone goes bowling with him, so I had to appease him, at this fantastic shopping mall called MBK. It wasn't cheap bowling, but once you start, you know why it's that hefty on the price tag. They have bowling shoe MACHINES, soft couches, GOOd lanes (unlike the worn out ones in Marina South), and good balls. I had to write this down on the puke bag, because Tabithan always amuses me with what he says at his age. When I asked him, "How come you can bowl so well?" in a bid to let the child have his moment of glory and pride, he replied, "It's my own bowler secret."

When overseas you have to ask around. For directions, for prices etc. But it made me realise that every stranger reacts almost the same way when approached. They give the initial shock reaction, eyes wide, and mouth open. But they warm up gradually and then very quickly, even cracking a joke or two.

Thai massage was good, especially after walking so long. For me it made me so damn relaxed yet so damn tensed at the same time, because that gentle-looking lady was actually using quite a lot of strength. I disguised some laughter in the form of a cough, or a chewing action, or sometimes just smiling to myself. I couldn't control, it was so funny, especially when she started to reach the groin, which was surprisingly ticklish. And she complained jokingly that I was too long and she was finding it hard to contort my body, which was what her body length could not contend with. You can have this message day in and day out, for what? 139 baht ? which is 5 something Sing dollars? For an hour! My brother got a transvestite which got him smiling to himself too. He or she was so flamboyant, I almost pitied my brother. :)

DAY 3

I wrote "spirit of self-learning" on my puke bag but forgot what it's about. But I think the Thai are so independent, that they can survive much better in this world.

This famous CHATUCHAK (something like that) is the fabulous shopping place for ANYBODY, because they have clothes and wigs to birds and dogs to pottery and furniture to shades and accessories. I heard somewhere that there's no way you can finish this place in a day and it was TRUE. What can I say? The repeated action of turning the head left and right as you walk down the narrow lanes is actually very tiring. You've got to be there to experience it. Let the pictures speak for themselves.

We had supper every night and I had the 7-11 burger every time, because it's VERY VERY good, and you see the bag of vegetables? It's given free to be sandwiched between the bread. And you bite into it, ooooo...

We had great seafood and shark's fin and bird's nest in ChinaTown...

DAY 4

A lot of things happened, more shopping and because I'm running out of steam, I will say we said goodbye and I DESPERATELY need to and want to go back. Life is great in the sense that a rain of relief sometimes comes in such a form and gives you a new boost to the next agenda in life.

Posted by Brandon at Tuesday, December 27, 2005 | Permalink

KHAIRUL IS BACK! And I'm chatting with him now, and I feel like I'm interviewing a rock star! Surreal. And this post is dedicated to NS men who are booking out this festive season.

DANIEL LEE, BERRRRTINUS etc., welcome home!

I suddenly have this mental image of the hourglass in "Days of our lives". We're all moving on and it's THRILLING.

Posted by Brandon at Friday, December 23, 2005 | Permalink

Back from Thailand which WAS more than enjoyable. Happy Birthday to fellow Geogers, CRYSTAL who's in Bangkok now and QUEEN DAWN, who's just enjoying life as uhhummmm a taitai. JUST JOKING!

Last night was the worst night of the year. Bookmarked. I went to the toilet 5 times. Suspect 1: Thailand's over-eating and unhygienic food. Suspect 2: The sun at Sentosa while playing beach volleyball and frisbee yesterday. This sucks. I went the the toilet at one time, with an interval of 20 minutes in between two sessions. It feels damn shiok, but at the same time you are astonished at just how much water your body can hold in the large intestine.

Sentosa is long gone. Other than the beaches, there's really nothing one can do there. When I walk past the merlion, I felt like telling people, don't waste your $8 or $10 to go all the way up, because it's just crap, for that kind of money. Shawn, Melvin, YY, Jianhao and SAMMMMUEL Yeo and I entered at 9 something and left at 3 something when I expected to be there the whole day.

One of my female friends from Primary School, JinJing, got into the final 20 something for the Project Superstar thing for campus students. But although I thought she was good, she didn't get in to the next round. I went to watch the auditions at J8 to support her, but it made me wonder how they judge the singers. C'MON! some bad singers got in based on looks more than on their vocal qualities. A sudden realisation : teenagers are over-passionate, too eager to win and get on. That earnest, incessant nod in full recognition of the judge's comments. The highly melodramatic rendition of love songs when one doubts whether they mean what they sing. Not necessarily a bad thing really, but it becomes a focussed but merciless pursuit for this goal that they think will be achieved at all costs. Like Mother Courage, I doubt we are always "angry enough". Not many things becomes so great that it consumes your life. Or so great that you would sacrifice your subjects or resources to achieve a goal, after which you feel empty, lost and just mad about why you chose to be so "angry" when you weren't truly "angry". (I don't know what that was, but getting started on this just made me go on and on.)

I'm working on a Bangkok trip memoir, because I've got to tell you guys about how amazing the trip went.

Posted by Brandon at Wednesday, December 21, 2005 | Permalink

Hi all, The production house I'm with is looking for someone to fill the position of full-time Administrative Officer.
He or she should:- be an 'O' or 'A' level holder;- be able to handle administrative duties and process paperwork efficiently, and;- be able to start either immediately or by Jan 2006.
The expected salary will be between $1200 - $1500. As my office email account is close to full, interested applicants can direct their CVs and resume to this email account (joez_tan@hotmail.com).
If anyone has any questions and enquiries, please feel free to contact me at 9843 7426. Thank you.Regards,Joseph Tan

Posted by Brandon at Thursday, December 15, 2005 | Permalink

I finally got down to packing my room on one of those days where watching dvds and tv and using the computer just got more boring. One level of my cupboard is a fold in its own right. One anticline - Geog notes, another anticline - other notes. I don't feel like throwing things away really, it makes no sense, but at the same time it makes perfect sense. I finally packed the bag I used on the last day of my O levels (no joke) which has been lying there for 2 whole years. Must have been a hard life down there, the pippette filler, curve rule and long rule, the last Geography MCQ paper, and all the dust and broken tissue.

I still am quite amused at how that bag looked like. And sometimes, you have to, might have been born to regret some of your previous life choices. That bag is a SQUARISH Chinaman-like bag, which can only be described as SQUARE. And a SQUARE TOP!, C'mon what was I thinking. That flat top hair was HIDEOUS big time. That Britney Spears dance, my sanity must have fell into the rubbish chute.

Today I did something which made me so damn ashamed, yet I felt it was coming. It had to happen, it was meant to happen. It's shamelessness intermingled with necessity. I mourn for my folly, yet in a happy way. It will go down in history.

A WALK IN THE PARK, mind you, my whole family. Decided after dinner. And it took 1.5 hours to walk the circumference of Bishan Park. Bishan Park, mind you.

PERHAPS LOVE - It was a major disappointment. It was a cliched plot packaged in a more ARTSY manner. Jacky Cheung HAS a musical voice, which was impressive! The Korean Mr something (DA CHANG JIN's MINZHENHAO) was funny, coz he felt alot like MINZHENHAO just in costume of another time and place. Zhou Xun looks like a chick (chick= infant chicken) but looked more and more alluring as her character was slowly fleshed out. This girl can ACT! And has a very ACTRESS look. (=the aura that she might be a wild baby beneath that meek, rabbit personality)

Sometimes, I wonder whether silence/pauses are the key ingredient to a successful ARTHOUSE film. Like a cue to add marks/points in the Oscar race.

Is "Stealth" out already or is it coming? Someone lead me to this movie. I want this movie RIGHT NOW!

The Billabong/Rip Curl/"INTERNATIONAL BRANDS" sale at some factory in Singapore proved to be a hoax. I was done the moment I saw the racks and trolleys, which was teeming with pyjamas-like outfits, outdated clothes, and suspiciously loose bras. It was one of the funniest things of the month, because we watched on the way to the factory several people file out of the building empty-handed, as if foreshadowing something bad to come. Ah, another funny thing in life.

I currently lead a life that makes no sense, but at the same time makes perfect sense. I was telling my mother, "THIS IS IT. THE TRUE HOLIDAY." I am enjoying everything I do (although I don't know what I did), everything that is to come (my aeroplane! my massage and food galore at Thailand! the tsd party! well, maybe NS?!?! question mark question mark).

I confess right now that in the preceding paragraph, it took me 5 seconds to recall how to spell "well". Sometimes, you sure need some mentally stimulating impetus to set your mind going again.

Posted by Brandon at Monday, December 12, 2005 | Permalink

I have a lump in my chest. Usually lumps on me go after a few days. But this one is DARK. Upon further examination, the skin is bound to this crater-shaped lump, which has no outlet or head. I am heading for the doctor's tomorrow. And also (don't laugh) to examine my butt problems.

Read an article about global warming in TIME. On one hand, the article provides for great insight into the issue. But I sometimes get quite fed up with the fact that people just can't determine whether global warming exists or not. Maybe one day, we should stop arguing about it and get down to doing something.

But come to think of it, asking me to stop using the Internet and comp to reduce electricity generation to ease global warming is not humanely possible. It's quite sad geographers are learning so much about the ramifications, ironically in the comforts of an air-cond room, with styrofoam (=CFC!) lunch boxes for take-aways, and large stacks of notes (pulp!) we never read.

Firefly Round 2 - It was enjoyable, actually. The whole day activity. Other than Kandy, I didn't find any Arts people around. So you could literally imagine how the setting was like. You know, how a Science person is distinct from an Arts person solely based on appearance??

I think I've found a new threshold in speech presentation. SERIOUS, which swept me like a thousand feet tsunami. For once, I thought the audience WAS listening to me, and somehow you had this power in you. That if you say, "you are ugly", they will wag their tails in delight and believe your gospel. Like a magician!

To Geogers: Stop the lovefest! :p
To the black in white man: Be a man and get in there! Support all the way! Till then.

Posted by Brandon at Thursday, December 08, 2005 | Permalink

I looked at one of friend's friendster's photo albums and came across a picture of his class in uniform. I WILL NOT BE WEARING VJ UNIFORM ever again. (Not in a resentful tone, but in sheer disbelief) Which is quite an amazing thought, because the last day you stripped it off and threw it into the laundry basket, there was no feeling of regret or nostalgia or just a general sense of awkwardness. Then, seeing my classmates all buzz and lust over "the Perfect Dress", what an irony!

Time WHIZZED past at prom two nights ago. In front of my eyes were flashes of HUMAN LIGHT, just snapping on and off, streaks here and there. Up there, chandeliers shine, as if silently registering the night's images, like the cameras that snapped to eternalise the moments, like in our minds that are teeming with memories and still trying relentlessly to put more in. Mad rush for photos, girls with their calculated steps, occasionally checking if their dresses were intact, guys walking with huge, confident swaggers and strides.

Everyone looked quite stunning actually, to my surprise. Some people whom I've never seen in my 2 years in VJ too. It's delightful, yet sad at the same time that you only notice someone when she has some make-up on, some big clothes on, some new hair done. But for many PRETTY girls I've noticed in school, they actually didn't look that pretty in make-up. And for those who look average, they were the ones who shone with make-up. I don't know what to make out of that, maybe less is more. And there's not just outer beauty and inner beauty. There's an extra OUTER OUTER beauty.

Yes, it finished before it all started, now I still have this feeling that prom is going to come when it HAS already ended.

Peirce Hiking! - Fantastic scenery at the reservoir. The typical "light reflects off the surface of the water" in the evening has a new meaning when you watch it yourself, coupled with the light waves, and the wispy, fleeting splash of a stone thrown into the water. The stillness of the water DISTURBED in fine patterns. Walking in a line with Catholic High boys, (and explaining to SAMUEL YEO the formation of EARTHPILLARS! and GRANITE and BASALT!), shouting "ONCOMING VEHICLE!", "INCOMING VEHICLE!", monkeys swinging off the branches, cooking RICE/PORRDIGE with solid fuel. AND THERE IS A LONG river in Peirce, which I'd have explored and traced if not for the need to stay in group. Years since I camped, this one rocked although it was slack.

SAT SUBJECT TEST 2 - Test started at 8 and I woke up at 8.30. RUSHED TO AJ like never before, and shouting to myself along the road waiting for my aunt to arrive with her car to drive me there. Why did I even register for math? It was just bloody hard. Literature? HA! Laugh my head off.

Posted by Brandon at Saturday, December 03, 2005 | Permalink